


only for tonight

by serendjpity



Category: VIXX
Genre: Angst and Porn, Bittersweet Ending, Clubbing, Explicit Sexual Content, Hand Jobs, Homophobia, I'm Bad At Tagging, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Mommy Issues, One Night Stands, Religious Guilt, hongbin is a mess, jaehwan is in this fic for like .2 seconds, sanghyuk is also a mess, sanghyuk is naive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-29
Updated: 2018-05-29
Packaged: 2019-05-15 07:40:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14786270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/serendjpity/pseuds/serendjpity
Summary: A snort, then, “You reek of mommy problems like I reek of cigarette smoke.”





	only for tonight

Clubs weren’t Sanghyuk’s place—usually, that was. 

The bass from the music was always so loud that he felt it pounding through his chest, the flashing lights gave him headaches, and he knew people saw his puffy eyes even though they could only see him when the lights flashed on him. He didn’t understand what part of those people thought it would be a great idea to grind up on him when he was obviously not having a good day because he didn’t want asses on his crotch, or sweaty arms wrapped around his waist, and definitely did not want grunts and moans in his ears. At least, not on the sweaty dance floor he didn’t. Maybe once he drowned his problems in alcohol, then he’d be more willing to get dirty. He was never one to enjoy drinking; the taste of any type of alcohol made his nose scrunch up, and the burning feeling going down his throat made him cough. Tonight though, he was willing to forget all of the negatives because fuck, he needed to get drunk. He needed to forget everything that had happened in his day. He couldn’t have his mother angrily shouting the same fucking Bible verse at him on repeat in his head all night. “Leviticus 18:22,” he bitterly mumbled under his breath, taking a sip of his drink, trying to block out the laughs of the men next to him as his face contorted because of the alcohol, “Do not have sexual relations with a man as one does with a woman; that is detestable… God, I sound like my fucking mom,” he scoffed, “That, Leviticus, is what’s detestable.” 

He needed to forget everything prior to finishing his first drink. Forgetting the smug smiles and mocking chuckles of the older men next to him as he struggled to down a rum and coke would be a good thing for his already ruined self-confidence. Maybe he should drink enough to completely black out.

The bartender pitied him. It was written all over his face as Sanghyuk ordered another drink and the club lights reflected on the fresh tear stains on his cheeks. His eyes were knowing as he slid the drink across the bar’s smooth surface. Sanghyuk felt a strong urge to punch those knowing eyes right off the bartender’s face. 

“Do you feel bad for every hardly legal kid that walks in here or is it just me?” Sanghyuk scoffed and hoped that the bartender picked up on the fact that it was a rhetorical question because he couldn’t be sure if he could handle an actual answer to that. It would rip open a barely healed cut. 

There was a sigh from the bartender as he stared at the image in front of him.“You aren’t special, kid. Don’t live your life thinking you are. I don’t give a shit about who you are or why you’re here.” The words should’ve stung, like the alcohol going down his throat, but even tipsy, Sanghyuk could tell that was an obvious lie. He could tell by the bartender’s eyes before he opened his mouth that he wanted to know what was wrong. He was whispering about the crying teenage-looking, just barely past twenty-one year old, drinking his second rum to all the other adults at the bar. Sanghyuk decided it was for the best, however, not to interrogate and just to sit and drink like an adult should. With a bitter smile, Sanghyuk raised his glass to acknowledge the bartender’s nasty words and forced himself to chug the drink in his hand.

One of the men that laughed at him earlier stood up, presumably to chase a woman that would think he was a creep. He certainly looked like one; he hunched over as if he were the Hunchback of Notre Dame and had a receding hairline big enough to put a football stadium. The thought made Sanghyuk snort into his empty glass. The person who took the empty seat called the bartender over and ordered three shots of vodka. Sanghyuk tried to mind his own business for the night, but he had to look at whoever ordered shots of vodka. Thousands of people could take shots of vodka without throwing up, but Sanghyuk was not one of them. The vodka-drinker didn’t look much older than Sanghyuk; couldn’t be older than twenty-three. His brown hair fell into his face as he looked down at his phone, typing something ferocious and long in the message box. It wasn’t until the bartender poured his shot that he looked up from his phone. His eyebrows, which were pulled together angrily, relaxed on his face as he swallowed a shot, then another, then another. His only reaction to the alcohol was a quick shake of his head as he placed the shot glasses back onto the polished wood of the bar. It wasn’t until the man met Sanghyuk’s stare that he looked away quickly. Pink flushed his cheeks and the alcohol couldn’t be blamed this time. 

The man put his phone down on the bar, screen side down. “It’s not polite to stare.” His voice was quiet compared to the booming music, could barely be heard over it, but he refused to scream over it. 

“I know.” 

Sanghyuk looked back from the crowd of people dancing to the voice next to him. He crossed his shin over another and let them swing. The man ordered two more shots. Once he was done, he stared back at Sanghyuk. Neither said anything until the bartender returned with another shot glass and filled it in front of Sanghyuk, then refilled a shot glass in front of the other man. The bartender and the man spoke about something softly, as if they had known each other. “Jaehwan,” the man began, and Sanghyuk watched the bartender give the man the same knowing look he gave earlier, except with no pity to be seen. 

The bartender—Jaehwan—pretended to take a chug from the vodka bottle before giggling and walking to another guy at the bar. 

“You didn’t have to buy me anything, you know,” Sanghyuk croaked, staring warily at the shot glass filled with vodka. He was more worried about making a fool of himself trying to drink vodka than a stranger spending money on him. A rum and coke was hard enough for him to handle; even just the idea of drinking vodka was sufficient to make him gag slightly.

The man—oblivious to internal crisis happening right next to him—easily swallows his fourth shot of the night before Sanghyuk could even pick his shot glass up. There was another moment of awkward staring where neither of them spoke or moved until the man rolled his eyes, took the shot glass from in front of Sanghyuk and took his fifth shot of the night. He quietly chuckled at the wide eyes staring at him before calling the bartender over yet again. 

“No more drinks, just the check.” The man peered at Sanghyuk before turning back to the bartender. “I’ll pay for him too.” 

The man laughed at Sanghyuk’s sputtering, babbling on about how he could pay for himself. Even the bartender couldn’t stop a little chortle as he walked away to get the bill. 

“Is that your way of flirting with me? Paying for my drinks?” His voice got defensive, and the man raised an eyebrow curious as to why the tone of the conversation had changed so quickly. “I don’t want a boyfriend,” Sanghyuk paused, looked the man up and down before all the anger left his voice, and he stepped closer so that his lips were lightly pressed against the man’s earlobe, “but I’d be down for a fuck if you are.” 

When he got no response besides hearing a breath hitch, he started kissing under the man’s earlobe, letting his arms lazily wrap around his waist. 

A moan barely heard over the music encouraged Sanghyuk to keep going, until a hand on his chest pushed him away ever so slightly, so he was face to face. Up close, he realized just how beautiful this man really was. His eyes were big and round and expressed his emotions perfectly. He started talking and Sanghyuk looked at his full lips, almost missing what was said because he started imaging how the man would look fucked out with red, kiss-swollen lips. “You don’t even know my name. What are you gonna moan later?” The man whispered, his voice dripping with desire. 

“Who said I’m gonna be the one moaning? You’re already putty in my hands with neck kisses.” Sanghyuk wasn’t sure if the alcohol was giving him bravado, or just the adrenaline of having a hot guy near to him, flirting back. The man smirked before taking a step back to distance them slightly. “Name’s Hongbin. Come back to my place and I can show you what being putty in somebody’s hands feels like.”

The line was cringy at best. Both of them seemed to realize it, but Sanghyuk was too caught up in the moment to say anything about just how bad that line was. The moment was only broken by Sanghyuk stuttering out his name eventually. With the introductions out of the way, he went back to kissing Hongbin’s neck, not caring that the people at the bar were watching them. He felt powerful, on top of the world, that he didn’t have to hide. 

///

Jaehwan met Hongbin’s eyes, a wide smile on his face. He thrust his hips forward, mouthing for him to ‘get some’. 

Hongbin’s eyes rolled, partially because his friend was being an idiot, but mostly because Sanghyuk was sucking a hickey onto the most sensitive part of his neck, and holy shit he wanted to go home to do more than just neck kisses. He couldn’t stop another soft moan as teeth scraped against the bruised area.

‘What about the bill?’ he mouthed back when Sanghyuk finished the hickey on his neck and moved lower to a less sensitive area. ‘I've got it covered," Jaehwan deadpanned.

And at that moment, Hongbin was never more glad to have a bartending friend. 

He pulled Sanghyuk off his neck and shoved him through the sweaty bodies to get outside and wait for a taxi. Hands were moving up and down Hongbin’s back, grabbing his ass to hear him moan again. 

“Wait… Wait until we get to my apartment,” Hongbin choked out through moans and gasps because he could barely handle having his ass groped and having all the clubgoers staring at him, wishing they were him. He never thought that public shit would turn him on, but as he opened his eyes and saw people watch him fall apart, it was a lot hotter than he thought it would be. Sanghyuk was relentlessly nipping at his neck, pushing him back into the wall of the outside of the club. “If you keep up, we’ll never get to my apartment.” The warning was ignored until Sanghyuk was forced off by two small hands on his chest. He looked down to see Hongbin’s hands holding him back lightly, and was met with a teasing smile on Hongbin’s face. 

///

“I’ll never be able to hail a taxi if you keep this up, and I’d like to do a lot more to you than I can in public.” The cravings for more made Sanghyuk stop and just admire Hongbin’s figure as he called a taxi over. His marveling couldn’t last long, as it only took a moment or two for a cab to pull up next to the curb. Hongbin’s body disappeared into the car, the door left open for Sanghyuk to join him. 

By the time Sanghyuk had gotten into the car, Hongbin had told the driver his address and had situated himself in the seat. A seatbelt was clicked into place so it sat across his body. “It isn’t a far drive,” he stated, his voice ever so raspy from being turned on. Sanghyuk, honestly, couldn’t give less of a shit how far it was. He was more interested in just how desperate he could make the other man before they reached his apartment complex. 

With nimble fingers, he clicked Hongbin’s seat belt so it retracted back to its original place in the car then placed his hand on the no longer constricted chest. Hongbin’s eyes were wide and confused, following the hand as it slid slowly down his chest, resting on his crotch. The expression in Hongbin’s eyes instantaneously changed into one of longing as he grabbed Sanghyuk by his hair and pulled his lips to his own. 

It was absolutely dirty. Hongbin’s hand grabbed harshly at Sanghyuk’s hair, pulling to give himself control of the kiss, and Sanghyuk was more than willing to give it to him. He enjoyed being a brat and forcing Hongbin to take control of the situation. He occasionally pressed the heel of his palm onto Hongbin’s crotch to make his hips jerk up at the pressure. He moaned—the sound, although muffled, was musical compared to the mostly silent car ride—into Sanghyuk’s mouth. Hongbin’s right hand trailed up and down Sanghyuk’s chest, the roaming fingers only adding to the overwhelming feeling of hypersensitivity. He pulled his hand out of Sanghyuk’s hair to grab the lonely left hand which was awkwardly hovering near Hongbin’s face. The kiss broke apart for a beat for them both to breathe. Their faces stayed close together, the passing streetlights illuminating the grin on Hongbin’s face. His hand took hold of Sanghyuk’s larger one to place it onto the back of his own neck. The gesture was so gentle compared to what they were doing just seconds before. It was with a quiet chuckle that Hongbin taunted, “You don’t do this very often, do you?” Before Sanghyuk could defend himself, Hongbin closed the gap between their lips again. 

Sanghyuk swore that this kiss was even better than the last one if that was even possible. Hongbin managed to straddle him in the backseat, making a surprised sound as he settled on top of Sanghyuk’s thighs. Sanghyuk lifted his hips in the air to press their hips together, causing them both to moan. It was Sanghyuk that pulled back this time, leaning his head on the headrest. “I didn’t think you’d be able to do that in a car.” 

Hongbin bumped his head against the top of the taxi and leaned down against Sanghyuk’s shoulders to stop it from happening again. He smiled and shook his head. “I really didn’t think I was gonna be able to either.” He carefully picked his head back up to look out the car window and made a noise of recognition. “We’re almost at my place,” he announced, climbing back to the seat to grab his wallet and pay for the ride. Sanghyuk couldn’t stop the sour expression from overtaking his face, missing the feeling of being straddled and lips on his. He felt deprived of the feeling of Hongbin—of anyone—on him, feeling him, surrounding him.

The car came to a stop in front of a tall apartment complex in a part of town that Sanghyuk had rarely ever been in. The outside of the complex seemed nice, but he couldn’t get a great look because as soon as he stepped foot out of the car, Hongbin jumped out, grabbed his hand, and ran to his apartment, pulling Sanghyuk along with him. Hongbin fumbled with the keys before the door unlocked with a click and their bodies stumbled into the apartment, causing the door to hit the wall with a resonating bang. Hongbin entered after Sanghyuk and closed the door behind him with his foot. After it closed, his hands held Sanghyuk’s waist and pulled him so Hongbin was trapped between the door and a strong body. His hand grabbed frantically at the fabric of Sanghyuk’s pants, pulling him closer and closer until their bodies were touching everywhere. Chest pressed to chest, both of their moans were muffled as Hongbin snaked his arms around Sanghyuk’s body to try and come closer. The kiss broke apart, neither too sure of who pulled away. Hongbin took Sanghyuk’s hand in his own once again and with no words said, rushed them to an open doorway.

His mind was so clouded with thoughts of hands on his body and a familiar tightness in his pants that Sanghyuk hadn’t processed that the back of his leg hit a bed until his back bounced against the mattress and Hongbin’s weight was on top of him. Hongbin didn’t kiss him again, at least, not yet. He ground their fully clothed hips together and the loud keens added to the tension in the room. 

Sanghyuk wanted the clothes gone. The feeling of his jeans constricting him made the room spin like he had been on a carnival ride, and he wanted so much more than just to be dry humped until he came in his pants. He pushed Hongbin so he was sitting up on his knees, leaning on his toes. Hongbin raised his eyebrow as Sanghyuk fumbled with the zipper of his jeans. “I didn’t say you could do this.” 

“And I never said you could tell me what to do,” Sanghyuk snorted, an unattractive sound in an otherwise sexual conversation as he pulled Hongbin’s pants down to his knees, “Worry more about not waking up your neighbors.” Sanghyuk sat up to match Hongbin’s height to keep eye contact as his hand played with the band of Hongbin’s underwear before pulling it down, watching in amusement as Hongbin shivered from the exposure. His dick was half-hard and he grabbed at the belt loops of Sanghyuk’s pants; his eyes were needy and confused as Sanghyuk refused to let him pull his pants down. He whined, high and wanting as he stopped leaning on his toes so he was completely on his knees and Sanghyuk was at a bit of a loss. He had never been with another man before. He’d watched a lot of porn, and he jerked off a lot, but this was way, way different, and it was too late for him to try to back out. Hongbin’s eyes were unfocused and glazed, but even like this, it seemed he knew something was wrong. So, Sanghyuk did what he always did. He acted like everything was totally fine. 

He crawled around Hongbin’s still body so he was behind him, his lips able to bite at Hongbin’s earlobes and whisper sweet nothings into his ears. He reached his arm around the tiny waist in front of him and lightly wrapped his hand around the base of Hongbin’s dick. The touch was barely there, not hard enough to make Hongbin do anything besides sigh quietly. Sanghyuk moved his hand slightly, but the idea of having to give a dry handjob was pathetic enough to make him stop. “Where’s your lube?” He let go of Hongbin with the muttered question, his cheeks burned with embarrassment. 

Hongbin seemed to sober up, his eyes focused again as he shuffled away from Sanghyuk’s grip to the nightstand next to his bed. He leaned down to the second drawer and grabbed a half empty-bottle of lube and a couple condoms, then turned around and placed the objects next to Sanghyuk. They awkwardly exchanged thanks, then Hongbin repositioned himself back to how he was sitting before. Maybe it was positive that they weren’t facing each other. Sanghyuk couldn’t be sure he could look at the other man without blushing. 

The bottle opened with a subdued pop. Unsure of how much to use, Sanghyuk made an educated guess using his knowledge of porn. They never used too much in what he had seen; he only poured about a dime size drop on his hand before grabbing Hongbin again. His grip was tighter than it was the last time he tried, he realized, and he got more of a reaction. Hongbin’s hips thrust forward and he moaned, throwing his head back onto Sanghyuk’s shoulder. The breathing in the room was loud and chaotic and Sanghyuk couldn’t stop his ego from inflating ever so much, because he was the one doing this to somebody else. He was the one wrecking Hongbin with only his hand. Sanghyuk took control of the pace; torturously twisting his hand slowly like he would to himself. Hongbin gripped the covers so hard his fists turned white as Sanghyuk bit at the purple hickey on his neck. The room was filled with incoherent low pitched moans when Sanghyuk did something particularly enjoyable. 

“Not—gh—” Hongbin tried to start, but every time he tried to say anything, his own moans cut him off. Sanghyuk felt a clamp-like-grip on his wrist. Hongbin unclenched the blanket to hold onto Sanghyuk, urging him to go faster. The familiar grunts and groans that were filling the room became high pitched squeals and breathy moans. Hongbin was close, Sanghyuk thought because this is how everybody in porn acts right before they—

An exasperated whine cut off Sanghyuk’s thoughts. Hongbin’s body started to shake slightly as his moans became so frequent that it just became one drawn out moan. It was only a moment later that the moan became a wail, Hongbin’s back arched, and came on Sanghyuk’s hand. 

Hongbin’s eyes fluttered closed, his breathing heavy. His body shook with aftershocks and he went weak, automatically scaring Sanghyuk. Did he just mess up giving somebody a handjob? This never happened in any porn that Sanghyuk watched. They always just keep going after cumming. 

“Are you okay?” 

He didn’t really want to know the answer.

It was silent, save for the heavy breathing near Sanghyuk’s right ear and his heavy, anxious heartbeat filling his ears. Save it for Sanghyuk Han to hurt his first hookup via handjob. His mind began racing with every single thing that could’ve gone wrong. Did he send Hongbin into cardiac arrest? Would he need to call 911? Should he have listened to his mom when she said he should’ve gone into nursing? 

Apparently, no, he didn’t have to because Hongbin started laughing quietly, and Sanghyuk was perfectly aware that this was his first hookup but it may also have to take the title for the weirdest. “Christ, I can feel your heartbeat from here,” he chuckled, looking up at Sanghyuk’s face to witness the disturbed expression, making his giggles turn into full-on laughter. The confusion stuck on Sanghyuk’s features made Hongbin stop his laughter and turn to face him. “I really didn’t wanna come from a handjob.” His eyes were once again filled with an emotion that certainly wasn’t humor, and the quick difference gave Sanghyuk whiplash. “I do, however,” he started, Sanghyuk’s brain immediately comparing the stare to one that a lion gives when he sees his prey, “want to fuck you into submission.” 

All witty comments about how Hongbin was just submissive and that he wasn’t going to submit were stuck in his throat as Hongbin’s hands reached for his shirt and pulled it over his head, and all Sanghyuk could do was lift his arms so it wouldn’t get stuck. Hongbin’s animalistic glare moved to his stomach and his chest, and Sanghyuk wondered just how many hickies he was going to get. Hongbin smirked as his hands reached for Sanghyuk’s belt buckles again, and this time Sanghyuk couldn’t have brought himself to resist. 

His mother told him the Bible said a man lying with another man is a sin. If this was sin, the pleasure of having Hongbin fuck him so hard that by the end of the night, the only thing he could stutter out is the other man’s name, he’d much rather be in Hell than Heaven. 

//

He forgot where he was when he awoke. He was tucked into an unfamiliar bed with clothes that were too small. The shirt was gray and too tight and too short, fitting him slightly like a crop top, and the black sweatpants ended right above his ankles. It wasn’t until Hongbin put his laptop that was on his stomach on the bedside drawer that Sanghyuk remembered the hookup. Hongbin looked at him hesitantly before smiling awkwardly. “Sorry about the clothes. You’re a lot bigger than I am.” He wasn’t wrong. Sanghyuk was tall, built like he went to the gym constantly even though he didn’t. Hongbin was also tall, but he was thin, lankier than Sanghyuk. 

Sanghyuk nodded, letting an awkward silence fall over them even though he had dozens of questions. Hongbin seemed uncomfortable as he reached over his laptop for a pack of cigarettes—was that there the whole time? He didn’t offer one to Sanghyuk, just grabbed a small red zippo and held it to the cigarette until smoke rose to the ceiling. He physically relaxed after taking a slow drag, blowing his smoke-mixed breath away from Sanghyuk. It wasn’t until he looked back after a couple more drags that he offered the cigarette to Sanghyuk wordlessly. Sanghyuk shook his head, a mocking scoff following. “I knew you wouldn’t want it.”

Just like he had done with Jaehwan the bartender, Sanghyuk ignored the jeer except this time he tried to change the focus of the conversation onto Hongbin instead of himself. “I didn’t realize you smoked. You didn’t smell like it in the club.” 

“I don’t, usually. Only after sex.” Hongbin shrugged after saying it, and when all he got was a confused glare in response, he continued, “It calms me down. Not the best habit but I don’t give a shit at this point.”

Sanghyuk nodded like he understood, even though the explanation he was given only confused him further. 

“What time is it?” 

Hongbin picked up his laptop, situating it on his stomach again as he looked at his bright laptop screen, the light making him look like an ethereal creature. The artificial glowing of the screen made the light brown spots mixed in almost full dark brown eyes obvious.

“2:36 a.m.”

It was too early for Sanghyuk to be dealing with this.

“So, you definitely weren’t a virgin before tonight,” Hongbin blurted out. 

The bluntness of the statement made Sanghyuk snap his head up. “Huh?” he stuttered out, as Hongbin continued to write something on his laptop nonchalantly. 

Without taking his eyes off the laptop, and not acknowledging Sanghyuk’s stuttering, he continued, “No virgin moves his hips like you do. When I was on you in the car, you knew what you were doing. But, you’ve never had sex with a guy, have you?” With that statement, he closed his laptop and stared so intensely he could probably see Sanghyuk’s soul. 

With a nervous scoff and mindless playing with the pajama pants strings, he shamefully admitted that no, he’d never slept with another guy. “And,” if he’d already confessed this, he might as bare his soul, “I’ve never had a hook-up—before this one.”

Hongbin rolled his eyes as he brought the cigarette back to his mouth and kept it there, “I can tell.” He spoke around the cigarette, muffling himself. Hongbin blew out the smoke from his mouth into Sanghyuk’s direction and received a loud, wheezing cough as a response. “You didn’t know how to start the handjob, but I’ll give you props for once you figured it out. One of the best I’ve gotten in a while.” Hongbin put out the cigarette under his thumb and threw it in the trash next to the bed. “Hook-ups are simple. You go home with somebody, have some hopefully good sex, then hope the person you went home with is nice enough to let you stay the night. If they don’t say anything about you staying, you leave.” 

The end of his sentence was crisp as if it was an order he wanted to be followed. There was a serious look in his glare as he stared down Sanghyuk yet again, tension building up in the room. Sanghyuk’s eyes darted towards the door, wondering if that was his cue to leave.

“Don’t get ahead of yourself, Sherlock. I gave you my clothes, you can stay for the night. I’ve slept with tons of guys like you.” Hongbin announced it matter-of-factly, purposefully ignoring the offended look he was getting; his voice started insulting, but he quickly began to sound like a know-it-all. “You got in a fight with mommy or daddy, probably about your sexuality, and now you don’t want to see them because all you’ll do is fight again. You slept with me because I’m a not-so-bad-looking guy who gave you attention and to spite your parents.” With a knowing grin and mocking tone, he tried to imitate Sanghyuk’s voice. “‘Take that mom and dad! I’m sleeping with a man and you can’t stop me.’” 

After he finished chuckling at his own joke, he raised his eyebrow knowingly, positive that he got everything that had happened. He reached for his cigarette pack and lit another one. Sanghyuk hated to admit that he was right. He felt self-conscious like he could be read like a book by anybody. 

The novel of Sanghyuk Han’s life, available at your local bookstore.

“How do you know?” His voice was reserved, afraid that he would reveal more about himself by talking. 

A snort, then, “You reek of mommy problems like I reek of cigarette smoke.” 

The smell of cigarette smoke was taunting. The scent was horrid enough and words cruel enough to make his eyes water. 

“So then, what’s your life story? Why sleep with such obviously vulnerable guys?” If Hongbin could be nasty, then so could Sanghyuk. “Is it because you see yourself as some divine intervention? You act like you’re the best thing to happen in these guys lives. All you do is sleep around then act like you’re the reincarnation of Christ.” 

Hongbin let out a smoky breath as if to calm himself down. “What I do and why I do it is none of your business. But, now I do know that your mommy problems are because she’s religious, isn't she?” When he took another hit, it was clearly one to celebrate. His eyebrows raised and a smile resembling the Cheshire Cat’s on his face. Sanghyuk’s life was nothing but a guessing game to him. “You mentioned Jesus and divine intervention, and only kids that are forced to go to church every Sunday mention that shit.” Sanghyuk felt defensive as his own life story was regurgitated back at him, “I can imagine it now, younger you with your hair all slicked back and a polo—”

A loud huff cut him off as Sanghyuk stood from the bed. Hongbin’s small clothes were constricting and he was positive he looked like an idiot, but with the adrenaline that ran through his veins and the anger that made him see red, it hard for him to care about what he looked like. “My life shouldn’t be your concern. All you are is a hookup, and that’s all you’ll ever be to me and all the other men you’ve fucked,” he all but snarled. 

The insult was taken as an invitation to Hongbin. He smirked as he pulled the duvet off of himself and stood, prowling to meet Sanghyuk in the middle of the room. “I don’t fuck every time. If you wanna get your anger out, I’d let you use me.” 

Disbelief was all over Sanghyuk’s face as he smacked Hongbin’s crawling hand off of his chest. “You’re unbelievable.” 

He stormed away from the other man. His stomps made the lamp on the nightstand sway slightly. He grabbed his clothes in haste, thrown off to the side from earlier, and as he went to leave, he heard Hongbin’s mocking voice. “How are you gonna get home?” He hadn’t been offering to drive him, just taunting him. “Not like taxis drive by here like they do at the club.”

Turning around, he saw Hongbin with an eyebrow raised and arms crossed across his bare chest with one leg over the other, leaning against the frame of his open bedroom door. His neck and chest were covered with marks of differentiating shades of reds, greens, and purples. Even if Hongbin was a dick, Sanghyuk could admit that it was a sight to be seen—much like the Eiffel Tower, or whatever people consider a sight to be seen is. Sanghyuk wouldn’t know. 

“I’ll find a way.” His voice was confident and serious, but also demanded respect like a king. 

Hongbin rolled his eyes and turned back into his room, not saying another word. The scratch marks on his back were screaming red, standing out from the rest of his skin. Sanghyuk couldn’t see the marks for too long because before he could admire them, Hongbin had slammed his door shut. 

It was with a sigh that he went through his contacts, trying to find somebody that would pick him up without asking too many questions. 

//

Hongbin rolled out of bed the next morning, only able to ignore the way his body ached for so long. The five shots of vodka he drank the night before reared their ugly heads as he shuffled slowly through the hallway to get medicine, the floor chilly under his bare feet. 

He took a pill dry, staring at his reflection in the mirror. His hair made it so very obvious that he had sex the night before, standing up in all directions since it had been pulled. The hickeys on his body stood out on his pale skin like paintings on a museum wall. He stared for a couple moments before shuffling back to his bed and throwing himself onto the mattress and regretted it as soon as his head screamed at the feeling. It took all his willpower to pick up his phone, then to promptly ignore all the messages he had gotten from Jaehwan throughout the night.  
It wasn’t until his stomach growled an hour and a half later that he would have to force himself to get out of bed begrudgingly to eat something. With muttered angry nothingness, he haphazardly placed his feet on the floor and cursed at the cold. He grabbed a pair of socks and shoved them on his feet, content when he felt the immediate warmth. 

He walked with his arms across his chest, too lazy to grab a shirt and put it on. He’d manage, just like he had thus far in his life. 

As he dragged his socked feet across his apartment, something by his front door caught the corner of his eyes. He turned quickly and saw a gray shirt and black sweatpants. His gray shirt and black sweatpants, that he had given to Sanghyuk last night. 

They were folded in a neat pile, the shirt on top of the sweatpants.

Hongbin picked them up, and he couldn’t help but notice the lingering smell of the club, of the post-sex, of Sanghyuk on them. He sighed as he brought them back to his room. He threw them into his overflowing laundry basket and turned his back to them. Just like the marks on his body, the smell will be gone soon enough. 

They always are.

**Author's Note:**

> hi!! thank u for reading!  
> also thanks to mev and reenie for dealing with me. i love u guys.


End file.
